


Quia Non Morti (I Will Not Die)

by erwiiinsmith



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-04
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-01-18 04:57:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1415878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/erwiiinsmith/pseuds/erwiiinsmith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is the year 3850, and humanity still struggles against the power of the titans.<br/>The Walls are metal, made of electronics and technology that keeps it beating like a heart.<br/>The buildings are glass and metal, but resilient against the attacks.<br/>And the Survey Corps continue to attack. </p><p>(note: explicit scenes in later chapters)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Survey Corps

Levi walked to the end of the wall, his boot tipping over the edge, as he knelt down and stared out at the black abyss. They were surrounded by the cemement of a world before, littered with crumbled buildings and glass like confetti, old cars rusted from years of age and withering left as nothing more than metal skeletons and if one were to squint hard enough, lines showing the roads and the barriers between them. Levi looked up at the inky black sky, watching as the star strained to pierce from the darkness. It was times like this he thought of Isabel and Farlan, despite everything he'd see the faces of his brother and sister as he shut his eyes and let the cool, smoky winter air waft around him. He remembered looking up at the open sky for the first time, with the two of them by his side. Since their death, the sky never seems as bright. If anything it grew dimmer by the day.

"Heichou."

The cold voice broke Levi from his thoughts and he turned to see the cadet standing in the position of a formal salute. "Tch, Ackerman what do you want?"

She strode over to him with the confidence many other cadets lacked when alone in his presence. Her red scarf hung loose around her neck and drifted in the faint winds, to the same beat as strands of her dark black hair. As she drew closer Levi stood, having to look up at her due to their height difference, and noticed the blood shot lines, the smudging of kohl on her left eye rubbed off with perspiration, and the faint bags under her eyes, growing heavier by the day.

"I came to speak about my brother."

"Jaegar? What about him?"

"I don't think he should be taken on the next expedition."

"That's stupid. Especially since he's the reason we're going."

"I know where the basement is Heichou, my brother isn't needed."

She kneels down beside him, and he can smell the faint smell of soap on her skin. Through the smoky air intertwines the scent of strawberries and lemon and he clings to the fresh scent as he watched the faint stars. The two of them knelt by the edge, and if they wanted could have leapt off the wall and into the open world. Levi could feel the metal thrumming beneath him, the interlocking mechanism of the Wall working and ticking like a clock. He shut his eyes for a moment and felt it. Titaniam and re-enforced steel, galvanised only to strengthen it all. Behind them were the Wall Workers, men and woman who coated the Wall, who soldered more metal barriers, anything to keep the Wall from rusting and becoming weak.

"You can't protect him, not from all this."

He didn't look at her but could feel the weight of her gaze.

"He's my family-"

"And that's nice. But this is Humanity's Battle, family is not important."

He heard the intake of breath, signalling that she was about to speak but nothing came. Instead, he heard her rocking on the back of her heels as if she was preparing to leave. "May I request something?"

"I doubt my answer will stop you."

"I want to be with Eren, on the expedition."

"That's not my decision, ask Erwin-"

"Heichou, you know the Commander will put me with the supplies. Please."

Levi stood, with enough balance and skill that he did not once fear toppling over the edge. His 3DMG groaned with the movement and his fingers glided over the metal, the cool surface soothing him slightly. He opened his mouth to speak when his voice was replaced with another.

"Levi, Ackerman. We've been looking for you two."

He turned to see Erwin walking towards them, with Mikasa's mushroom haired friend Armin walking beside him. Levi refrained from groaning aloud, if Erwin was here it meant there was going to be a meeting. "We're having a meeting," Erwin announced as if he read Levi's mind. "Armin and I have worked out a formation for the expedition, and Hanji said you've all to hand in your gear - modifications must be made."

"Fine," he sighed, already in the process of unbuckling his gear. His body already felt lighter at the loops slipped from him.

"Commander," he heard Mikasa say, "I wanted to ask something of you."

He turned to see Armin looking wide-eyed, and Erwin looking nonchalant as Mikasa spoke. He watched Erwin for signs of irritation but instead, he seemed impassive. Levi knew that if it were anyone else, without Mikasa's skill, Erwin would have walked away by now. "I want to be with Corpral Levi, protecting my brother."

"But Mikasa," Armin began, "I-"

"Please Commander. I can protect him."

Erwin's chest rose and fell, and he turned to look at Levi for a moment. Despite himself, Levi gave a slight nod, prompting Erwin to say, "Okay, I accept. Armin, switch Mikasa's position. The meeting is in an hour in the main hall. Don't be late." He turned swiftly on his heel, sparing only a glance for Levi before leaving, Armin quickly following. His blond hair bounced with each movement, reminding Levi of an excited puppy. He rolled his eyes at the sight and turned back to the sky. It somehow had grown even blacker, and the wind picked up furiously. He refrained from holding down his cravat. Only he and Mikasa remained on the top of the Wall, watching the distance and the World Before. He strained against the wind to listen, and heard the faint crashing of the titans in the distance. He looked to Mikasa and saw her looking in the same direction. The noise was faint, but against the silence it was piercing, as if someone has snapped a pencil in a silent grand hall. The two of them were poised, despite everything, their fingers itching towards the blades. They were soldiers, prepared for any dangers. He wanted to ask her how clearly she heard it, how trained her ears were, but kept his mouth shut. Below, an old car was dragged through the wind, the metal skeleton groaning in the silence. He wondered if titans ever thought to use them as weapons, if so - the number of casualites would double at the least.

"I'm going to find Eren," came Mikasa's voice, faint like the smell of the soap, as if she knew he wouldn't care. She was right really.

"Have fun Ackerman, don't be late."

(...)

The room was cramped, with cadets and soldiers pushing for the last few chairs. Levi leaned back on his, watching it all from the raised stage, his legs crossed in their usual position. Hanji went through the logistics of the modifications to the 3DMG though it was clear most had no idea what she was saying. At point it even seemed like Hanji didn't even know. All Levi saw was a flurry of hand movements, followed by the familiar loud, shrill voice of the scientist. Behind him was the screen, projecting how the modifications would improve the gear. Buildings inside the walls were made prodominiently of glass and metal, and so the gear usually caused breakages. However, the scientists managed to produce hooks that would grab to the metal bars which often covered all glass structures. The gear would also grow to be lighter, and allow for more movement. There was more but Levi didn't care, none of this effected him. All it meant was more training, and up to three days with no gear leaving the Wall unprotected.

"Alright," Erwin barked, commanding the attention of the room. It was a a medium sized hall, holding around 200 people, a quarter of which were either standing or handing from the metal posts for a better view. The entire room was brightly lit bby the hanging light, and helped by the silver moonlight which pooled in from the wide windows. It all seemed to ridiculously designed, so easily broken, but everything was re-enforced, stronger than stone some said. "Five days from now, the Survey Corps will embark on their next expedition. In those five days, you are all expected to become accustomed to the modified gear. If you are not, you will not be allowed to come, that includes both veterans and cadets. We don't need weak links during this mission. Our aim is to take back the Wall Maria, but this will be no easy feat. Originally, our intent was to travel to the Jaeger basement, but without securing the wall we will be sure to fail. This will be Humanity's Strongest Triumph, and we will once more defeat the titans."

"How do you intend to do this?" asks a voice in the back ground.

Levi can't see the face, but it's a woman's voice to be sure. Instead, he's distracted by Sasha Braus in the second row, muttering something to some bald kid. "Humanity's Strongest this... Humanity's Strongest that... he needs a new naming system." She turns in time to see Levi's glare, and shuts up immeidately. He refrains from smirking.

"Well, the cannons of course." It's Arlert, and he comes to stand beside Erwin on the stage. "They are filled with ammo from the last attack. What we intend to do a a widescale variation of what we did in Rose." Armin explains the plan, to blind the tians using the cannons, and then sending men in for the kill. It sounds good enough, and Levi is silent as others begin to argue over the logistics of it all but it's futile. Both Armin and Erwin contradict each case, making their points sound the most reasonable. "Once the majority of titans are dealt with, we will send in Eren to block the wall."

"With what?"

"That's where we come in!" Hanji begins, taking a place beside Erwin, "The Wall is said to have a a secondary layer, it's not as strong as the primary but strong enough for our needs, however, it seems to be pulled down through the mainframe. Levi and Mikasa will be in charge of guarding Eren. His job is to reset the mainframe and pull the second layer down. After the titan attack, any hope of doing this electrically."

Once more, the yells began but soon enough Erwin had control again and went through travel formations. Levi couldn't help but notice how Armin was being groomed, as if it was his job to take up the logistics of the Survey Corps. How could Erwin trust a child with that? Soon enough, the Corps started leaving the hall with orders to head to their rooms and get some rest as training begins the next day.

"Levi," calls Erwin over the crowd and with an audible grumble, Levi walks to his side. As he reaches him, he sees Eren standing with his sister. There's no denying the brat grew suddenly more nervous in his presence. It would have been endeering if he weren't so annoying, and Levi made a point of ignoring him as he turned to face Eren.

"What?"

"You and Mikasa will be training together, Hanji has prepped your 3DMG. The two of you need to train now, in order to protect Eren. I need you to be familiar with the changes."

"And why is the brat here?"

"He will be training with you as well. I want these two as skilled as you."

"I only have five days Erwin, I cannot perform miracles. She'll be fine, but he's an idiot."

Eren remained silent, though Levi noticed that Mikasa pushed him behind her, "Don't speak to him like that," she growled.

"Listen Eyebrows, I don't want to work with these brats. I'll train with my team, if they want, they can join."

"Levi, I'm used to giving you free reign, but on this I say no. You must train with Ackerman and Jaeger, they need to be prepared. I also need you to improve their strength. Last time, even in titan form, lifting the boulder was an incredibly difficult feat for Eren. We're going to have less time, and less men will be on this mission. He needs to be prepared."

"Tch, fine. Morning, 5:30am. Do not be late."


	2. Early Rise

"Eren, we should take a break."

"No, just five more minutes, I can't get my balance on these!"

Mikasa dropped from the platform and landed beside her brother, rolling onto his stomach as he pushed himself. He ignored her outstretched hand and breathed out heavily, each breath marking the metal beneath him. Mikasa crossed her legs underneath her and looked around the training hall, even she had to admit it was incredible. When the Walls were first built, the training hall was used as a storage facility, but it was turned into training grounds four years after the first titan attack. It was breath taking, crystal clear glass formed the large walls, so that anyone outside could see the bright green rolling hills and the flowers blooming from the gardens, loud pinks and warm reds, soft blues and soothing yellows bursting from the ground like fireworks. Metal bars acted as the support structure, and made up the actual training ground itself. High metal walls with perches, metal cage like structures that towered in the enormous rooms, metal tunnels for the cadets to slide through, it was like a massive playground for those who enjoyed the thrill of the kill. Mikasa turned to look at the projector, and saw it was aimed for the centre of the room. Once, people would learn to kill through large titan cut-outs, but with the progression of science, a titan hologram is used and comes in multiple modes to give a more realistic idea of what they would be up against. Mikasa had used it once, when Eren was in hospital after the Annie's attack. She had planned one setting up for two aberrants one after the other, but something had happened to the holograms meaning she was left alone with four aberrants, two 15m, one 14m and a 13m class. She had killed three of them before Commander Erwin shut her down.

"I don't understand," Eren grumbled, breaking her from her thoughts, "the gear is only lighter, how is harder?"

"You're going faster, you have less time to plan."

"How do you do it?"

She could only shrug, "I don't know exactly. But with practice you'll get it. You're the best with the gear in the 104."

She refrained from smirking when she was him blush and quickly stand, "Shut up Mikasa, we both know that's you."

If had meant it to be harsh, he had failed and instead flashed her a small smile before walking off the end. Mikasa leaned over to watch as Eren spun mid air and deployed his gear. He still wasn't used to aiming for the rim of the metal that lined all buildings but he had gotten better from when they had first arrived. Prior to his request, Mikasa woke two hours earlier than planed and trained with Eren. She hadn't broken out in a sweat, she was used to the speed, but she could see how tired Eren had grown.

"We have half an hour before Heichou meets us, we can take a break now!" she calls down as Eren thrusts himself upwards and flips, deploying the gear once more. He's balanced this time, and incredibly precise in his footing, but it's so slow. Even in gear, he'd be killed in an instant. Eren pulled himself onto a ledge lower than Mikasa's and called up that he agreed and she refrained from sighing audibly in relief. It didn't take a genius to see how much Eren looked up to that annoying midget, and she feared how far he would go to prove his worth to him. Mikasa spun from her spot, and deployed her gear, springing with ease as she thrust herself on to Eren's platform and stood with ease. He'd laid on the ground and was breathing out heavily, his legs dangling over the edge. Mikasa lay down beside him, ignoring the clink of her gear against the metal, and listened to the silence.

(...)

She was standing alone, glass crunching beneath her feet with each movement. Everything was broken buildings were torn to the ground, the Walls were torn open and metal wiring hung like curtains. Blood splattered the cement, bodies littering the streets between the glass and the metal and the chaos. The sky was filling with grey, a sign of the inevitable rain, and she felt the smoking air fill her lungs. In her hands were her blades, dripping with blood and she tried wiping it on her trousers, but the blood would not move. Then she heard it, the sound of crashing coming towards her. Seven aberrants crawled over the rubble, all of them focused on her. She looked around, there were no buildings left standing, no horses for her to ride from. It was just her and the titans. Behind them, she saw the sun pouring through the clouds and pooling around something, someone. Eren. Without a second thought, Mikasa knew she had to reach him. She ran forward, just as an aberrant jumped from it's spot. She deployed the gear, the metal sticking into it's stomach. Her body shot upwards with a jolt sending a sudden flash of pain along her spine, but not once did she stop. She swung around the titan and ran along it's bite before releasing the gear and jumping in the air, slashing the back of it's neck with ease. As the titan plundered to the ground, she kicked from it's neck and jumped into mid air, sending her gear into the throat of the next closest titan. It reached out, it's rough hands inches from her face, but Mikasa bit her lip and pushed forward, the wind blasting around her. She dropped from a moment, as another titan reached for her, and swung onto it's shoulder. The gear stuck into the titan's face and Mikasa dropped once more before it tore into her. Once more, she found its neck and slice the back, screaming with all the rage and anger she kept inside. The titan fell to the ground and Mikasa gave herself a moment to look around. It was all broken, there was nothing, no life, no hope. Humanity was gone. But she had to find Eren. She spun once more and propelled herself forward, aware that she had no idea how much gas was left in her tanks. One more titan is victim to her blade, and for a moment, Mikasa noticed how the blood smears over their wounds, and that one the ground, large pools of blood covering the cement. It was so unusual that she wasn't focusing, and that's when the titan grabbed her. She struggled in it's grasp, unable to pull her blades out in order to slice her way out. It stared at her with it's wide eyes for a moment, and Mikasa screamed out Eren's name, if she was going to die - he'd be the last thing she'd think of. The titan opened it's mouth, it's hot breath making her want to gag. And then it stopped. There was the sound of slicing flesh, and the titan began to crumble, loosening its grasp, and she plummeted to the ground. She was disorientated, and so tired, that she let herself fall, not caring what was soon to happen-

"MIKASA!"

An unfamiliar voice called her name, and she turned to see a blur coming towards her. A moment later, she was in someone's arms, warm and safe, and let herself be carried for just a moment before awakening to her senses. She couldn't see the face of her savior but she felt as he dropped her for a moment to adjust his gear.

"I'm fine," she grumbled, and pulled from his grasp.

There were no hands reaching for her, and instead, she adjusted her course, her gear slicing into the neck of a falling titan, and gripped onto it as it crashed to the ground. Breathing heavily, she saw that all the titans were slain, but their bodies were still present. Why weren't they fading? Finally, she extracted the gear and turned to see another body walking towards her. "

I told you, we have to stick together." It was Levi, and he stared at her with eyes filled with both irritation and worry. Blood covered his cape and he muttered to himself as he tried to clean it away. He was tired, dark circles under his revealing that lack of sleep. "I have to find Eren." He grabbed her hand as she turned, stopping her from leaving.She tried to protest but she saw the conflict in his eyes, "Heichou?"

"You haven't called me that in a long time."

"What's happening?"

He dropped her hand and stood tall, with the confidence she knew him for. There was something different about him but she couldn't pinpoint it."They're all dead. Erwin, Hanji...Eren, everyone you knew. They're gone."

He spoke like a ghost, with a hint of the bored voice he used in a world before, "You're lying," she growled. Grabbing him by the jacket, she pulled him upwards, "You're supposed to be Humanity's Strongest!" She punched him, and before he could protest, she slammed her fists into his stomach over and over. She saw Eren and Armin, crying as they finally reached the ocean, the two of them like children, running and crying and laughing and alive. When did she even see this? How could she have this memory? Her punches died down, and Levi took her hand in his and gripped it tightly.

"Mikasa, your memory. It's fading - we need to reach the labs."

"What, why?"

And that's when she realised, he was calling her Mikasa. Never had he referred to her by her first name, why was he now? "Is there anyone left?"

"We are the last of the soldiers in this expedition. I need to make this clear Mikasa, the 104 are gone - we tried to save them, we did and I'm sorry. But we have to find the labs." But Mikasa couldn't hear him as he spoke of testing, as he spoke of humanity, all she could think of was was Eren and Armin - how could they be gone?

(...)

"Mikasa wake up!"

Eren's voice brought her to a jolt, and she caught her breath as she suddenly sat up. He was standing, and the mere sight of him made her want to cry. Everything felt so real, she could almost feel the cool winds.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to sleep-"

"It's fine, good thing I woke up though. Heichou will be here in five minutes. Come on."

She felt heavy as they made their way down. Instead of using the gear, they opted fo the stairs hidden in the back and walked to the storages to dig out fresh canisters of gas and more blades in case. She couldn't stop looking at Eren, watching the way he focused, thought, spoke. The idea of losing him again...

"You okay?"

"Hmm? Yeah, I'm fine."

"Well then, do you think this will go well?"

"I don't know Eren. But... there must be another way. Should you put yourself in such danger?"

"For Humanity I'd do anything. I have to destroy those titans... for Mom."

She couldn't speak before the doors of the hall swung open and Levi strode in. He stared at the two of them with disinterest and did not move, showing that they were expected to come to him.

"We will not be using the training hall," he said in a bored voice. "I think the trees would be better."

"I don't, the point is to learn how to maneuver in the city," Mikasa argued.

"Well Ackerman, I didn't know you'd been promoted to ranking officer. What are you now, Corporal, Lieutenant?"

"I am not an Officer."

"Well then your opinion means shit."

He turned on his heel and walked out, pushing the doors open with a flourish. Silently, the cadets followed. They were made to run the two mile distance from the training hall to the forest at incredible speed, and for the first time in an age, Mikasa almost felt tired. Eren trailed behind and she used moments of waiting for his as forms of a break. They stood at the mouth of a forest that stood in the centre of the field, with high trees what seemed to tower over them like giants. Levi paced before he spoke, and there was no sign of fatigue in him.

"You will follow me through the forest, keep up."

"Wait, Heichou," began Eren. "Mikasa and I have never worked with trees. Is there a different method-"

"Just watch me Jaeger." 

Without another word, Levi shot off into the woods. Eren made to follow straight after, but Mikasa stopped him. "You heard him, watch." For a few moments, thirty seconds at the least, they watched Levi hide in the darkness and disappear from view, swinging from tree to tree.

"Come on Mikasa!"

Mikasa watched her brother move into the trees. He was doing it wrong, she could tell already. The branches he chose were to far apart, and he was spending more time traveling between them. Mikasa moved next, and found the rhythm easily, choosing low and thick branches for perches. She could see Levi, and grew closer with each passing moment, making sure she could still hear Eren at the very least. Five days, and then she could protect her brother. Just five days. Her breathing quickened, and her body relaxed into the motion of each jump. She was silently thankful that Eren had made her wake so early as her body was already warmed up, prepared for the heavy training. She focused on her breathed, on the feel of the trees, on the sound of the wind flying past her ears. She focused on anything but the dream.


	3. Memories

The rain thundered above him, stabbing into his skin like a thousand knives made of ice. The smell of metal and blood was thick in the air, and Levi swallowed as he watched the titans crash around him, their wide eyes scanning for him. He felt Farlan beside him, breathing easily, and despite himself - smiled.

 "Two thirteen metres, that's nothing."

 "True, but we still need to be careful."

 They stood on the highest ledge, but even from their vantage point, their view was obscured by the heavy rains and murky skies. "Where's Isabelle?"

 "She went to the Wall, she's waiting there for us."

 The two of them nodded, speaking in their silent language, and jumped off, releasing their gear so they swung through the buildings with ease. Levi's body relaxed into the motion of it all, his muscles reacting to the change in direction before he could even think and his legs kicked him upwards. Farlan swung behind him, the two of them watching over one another. When he fought beside his brother, Levi knew he'd never have to watch his back - just as Farlan knew he'd never have to watch his front. Levi pulled himself around a corner of a building when he saw it. A fifteen meter, coming right for them. "Farlan!"

 He shouted just as he dropped from his gear, and spun to see Farlan following in pursuit. They swung for a lower ledge and rolled into one of the metal hiding spots.

"Where did it come from-"

 "You think I know?"

 "What do we do now Levi?"

 "We need to get to the Wall."

 They crawled through their metal hole, their gear scratching the surface in familiar clang. On any other occasion, Levi would have managed to slay the titan but the rain as too heavy, and there wasn't enough time to think it through. Farlan and he found the end of the metal spot, which they discovered was a vent if anything, and crawled out, opting to run on foot until the neared the Wall. Levi brandished his blades, griping them tightly as they run, scanning each and ever corner. Levi breathed easily, listening not only for the sound of titans but for Farlan behind him. It gave him a sense of ease, and then they froze. A titan, an aberrant, appeared, crashing into one of the buildings and sending it flying to the ground, smashing into a thousand shards of glass. Levi turned in shock, before looking back at the aberrant - it was crawling, poised on the back of it's feet like an animal. It's hot breath broke through the cool rain and there was a blank stare in it's eyes. Farlan brought out his blades and came to stand beside Levi, the two of them watching the creature.

 "What now?"

 "How am I supposed to know, you're the one with the plans."

 "That's you!"

 The titan stirred, preparing for an attack. Levi felt like a trapped animal, and bit on his lip. "We're going to kill it. Up on the right, there's a vantage point. We're going to jump, swing, and cut it. Okay?"

 "Sure."

 He took two more breaths and then nodded. And like that, everything sped up. He and Farlan shot to the right as the titan dove forward, barely missing their bodies. Levi pushed forward, running along the frame of the building before jumping backwards, the titan barely moved before he slashed his blades, feeling it's flesh slice beneath him. He heard it scream in pain as he crashed into the wall and rolled onto his back. The rain cooled his face and for a moment he wished he could lay there.

 "LEVI!" He jumped up, watching as Farlan spun, sending his blades into another aberrant who had just appeared. The one was smaller than the last, but faster, and Farlan only managed to use one blade. It didn't matter though, somehow his brother's cut had been deep enough, and he kept his blade in as he traveled to the other building.

 "Far-"

 "There's four more coming! I don't know what's happening, but make the call!"

 "The three on the right, they're mine."

 "Levi! No-"

 Before Farlan could stop him, Levi was moving as his usual speed, where the world blurred around him. One titan, a fourteen metre, was merely a speck before his blades slices through it, but the other two proved to be an issue. The rain made everything heavier, and Levi strained under it, before pushing forwards. He flipped from one building, sending his blades into the neck of one more titan before he skidded on the top of a building, tripping over himself in the process. Then he saw it. Farlan spun in the distance, his blade slicing into a titan, but mid-air... there was no way he could see it. The aberrant jumped out of no where and opened it's mouth. Farlan barely had the chance to blink before it swallowed him whole.

 "FARLAN!"

 It had to be a joke, some cruel trick of the lighting. Levi spun, slicing his last titan and watching it crash to the door before rushing over. Everything was covered with blood, he imagined it seeping through the glass, smashing through it all. He roared in the empty air, blinded by white hot rage, and sliced through two more titans before crashing on the top of a roof. "Big brother!" He turned to see Isabelle running for him, her eyes wide with panic as she helped him up, "I saw you from the Wall. Where's Farlan?"

 "A titan- it got him."

 She dropped his hand and backed away in horror, "But you were supposed to protect one another! How could you-" She bit her lip and turned away, but he could hear her tears. Suddenly, she pulled out her blades, Levi feared she'd attack him but then he saw the aberrant. He poised for the attack but Isabelle already jumped from the edge, swinging around the creature and slicing it's neck, screaming as she did so. Levi ran to the edge and prepared to jump, when another titan jumped up. It knocked him back and he barely soot before he say it had Isabelle in its mouth. Half her body was gone, only the outside remained hanging out.

 "Isabelle!" He reached out his hand, as if that could save her.

 "Goodbye Big-"

 Before she could finish, the titan crunched down, and half her body came crashing down to the earth, landing beside Levi. He scrambled to her, losing all his composure, his hands slippery with her blood and the rain. Her eyes, once so bright and green, were slowly losing all colour, and her face - once so happy and young, as expressionless. She was cold, so cold. Levi wanted to cry, he wanted to scream and tear himself to shreds but he couldn't. He was hollow, a shell. He'd lost them both. Now, he had nothing. He slipped off his cape, ignoring the force of the rain, and covered her with it. He shut her eyelids, and for a moment, it looked as though she was sleeping. "I still can't save you two," he whispered, before turning to face the titans. The next five minutes where a blur, filled with blood and screams and anger. He screamed their names as he sent three more titans to the ground. Their blood burned his skin but he didn't care. At the moment, he wanted to die beside them. He flipped in the air, feeling the rush of his body dropping to the ground before his blades slices through more flesh. He lost count of it all and crashed into a roof, unable to hold himself up anymore. Suddenly, the rain stopped, the skies clicked back into their usual form and a voice monotonously stated, "End of Simulation." Levi grumbled as he pulled himself up, his legs shaking, and saw Erwin standing by the control panel with his arms crossed as if he was about to scold the Corporal.

 "What is it eyebrows?"

 "You have to stop doing this."

 "Doing what," he groaned, dropping from the building onto the walkway, "I'm training."

 "And training involves you nearly killing yourself?"

 "Emphasis on the nearly Erwin."

He walked past the Commander and picked up the key code with the simulation, dropping it into his pocket. "Levi, they wouldn't want this-"

 "Don't pretend like you knew them."

 "What do you think you're going to achieve?! One day you'll beat this simulation and save them? It won't bring them back." The two of them didn't look at one another but Levi remained where he stood. He knew there was no point, Hanji had even told him that it'd be near enough impossible to change the events of the simulation but he'd always come so close. His hands shook at his sides, it always felt so real, he always forgot that it wasn't real, but he never stopped. One day, one day he'd save them. "Well, Ackerman is waiting for you at the forest."

 "Great."

 "Levi-"

 He left before another word was said.

 

Mikasa was sitting underneath the shade of a tree, twiddling the frayed end of her scarf in her fingers. She didn't notice Levi walking up and when he made himself announced, made no motion to move.

"Heichou," was all she said.

"What is it Ackerman? I was training."

"You still train?"

"You expect a doctor to read medical books, you expect a tailor to look at improving their methods, why would I be different?"  
Above them, the sun shines and for once the sky is clear, the only sound being the birds in the trees. "You're wet."  
Levi hadn't realised that he had left his cape back in the training room, and his shirt stuck to him from the rain. he picked at it and shock slightly before shrugging, the sun would dry it eventually. He dug into his pocket and produced a tub of tobacco and paper. "You smoke?" Mikasa shook her head and Levi proceeded to roll himself one before lighting it and leaning against the base of a tree, exhaling deeply.

"Why are you wet?"

"Why won't you let that go?"

"Because you won't answer my question."

"I told you, I was training."  
Silence followed after, and Levi took the time to watch the distance and smoke his cigarette, feeling the calming effect of the tobacco course through him. "Why did you need to see me?"  
"I want you to help me with combat."

He laughed, flicking his bud down and stomping out the remaining embers with his foot. The scent of the cigarette carried in the air and he breathed it in one last time before walking away. This caused Mikasa to abruptly stand, and she grabbed his hand. Her skin was smooth against his, and soft - nothing like he would have expected.

"Where are you going?"

"If there is one person who does not need help, it's you Ackerman. You're stronger than everyone out there put together."

She blushed, and hid her face away before dropping his hand. He felt his skin grow suddenly colder at her absence. "I'm not like you Heichou. I'm too... bold. When you fight, you're controlled. I need to get better, I _need_ to save my brother."

"Fine, I'll help you."


	4. The Depths of the Corps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life has continued, with plans for the re-taking of the Wall drawing near.  
> The Survey Corps are desperate for more recruits, eager for this to be their main strike of attack.  
> But there is more, hidden under the robotic land.  
> (POV: Jean & Mikasa)
> 
> \- a bit longer to make up for the time i was away!

"Okay, okay, you can have another sugar cube," Jean grumbled as he reached into his pocket to fish out another cube for the displeased mare. Her name was Shadowfax, that much he knew, and she was a demanding horse. Everyday, Jean had to ensure Shadowfax retained her pure white coat and the horse wouldn't let him leave before the job was done. "You know, in a couple of days you won't have any luxuries," he snapped but the horse didn't seem deterred and instead, allowed him to walk away after receiving her treat. Despite his moody exterior, Jean was fond of his time in the stables, it gave him time to think as he mindlessly groomed the horses and worked on his chores, and allowed him time away from his fellow troop. He dropped down on one of the bales of hay, audibly groaning into the thick, musty air. The stables were smaller that the ones in Trost, and the horses were lined up in separate stables with the usual water droppers and packs of hay, though they were effortlessly clean - no doubt due to the orders of the Commander. Each station had the horses statistics on them: their speed, their agility, as well as details such as their age. Younger horses faired better, but older horses had experience. The air was lit in a yellow hue, dripping out onto the black expanse of the fields like spilt ink, and flecks of hay drifted lazily in the air. Jean popped a cube in his mouth and shut his eyes, leaning against the metal wall behind him, listening to the sounds of the night. Under the thrum of life the horses stirred in the otherwise silent night, he could faintly hear the clicking of the Walls, or at least imagined he could. He wondered what it would be like, charging to his death once more.   
He shook the negativity from him in a moment, and bit on his lip. Really, he was thankful for the shifts at the stables; after Hanji had heard Eren refer to Jean as "horse-face" she put him on morning duty, a 4am start, but it meant that the nights he spent unable to sleep would not be wasted.   
"Marco," he whispered, "oh Marco..."   
"Yeah."  
"Jesus fucking fuckity christ!" he exclaimed as he fell from his bale of hay onto the hard ground. Scrambling to his feet before slipping once more and crashing back down to the ground. "Don't do that! You could have given me a heart attack," he growled from the ground, though it was hard to stay angry when he saw the smile awaiting him from behind the stable wall. Half hidden under metallic configuration, a parody of what once was.   
"Sorry," Marco smiled, radiating his usual warmth, "but I brought you hot chocolate." Jean clicked open the other boy on, and rushed to grab him some bay to sit on, eager to get him off his feet. He wondered what it would be like, to kiss him on the cheek, to show him...   
"So er... you couldn't sleep either?"  
"No, and I noticed your bed was un-slept in."  
"I have horse duty."  
"Doesn't mean you get no sleep Jean. What's on your mind?"  
"Nothing."  
"Don't lie to me Jean. Not me."

Jean wanted to tell him, but he couldn't, because he couldn't bare seeing Marco's face change to one of sadness. He looked at his best friend, at the way half his body was not robotic, each movement sending a faint buzz into the air, the scent of metal clinging to Marco and masking the once lemon scent he had associated with him. When Marco had been attacked by the titan, his nerves were torn, but somehow - they did it. Jean remembered finding Marco's body, broken against the wall as if he was a discarded doll, a toy a child had broken and grew tired of. He remembered crashing to the ground, clutching the hand that remained, holding in tears, and that's when he felt it.  
It was like the clicking of a clock, faint but there, constant and alive. So beautifully and wonderfully in love.   
"Marco! Marco you're alive! Someone! He's alive! HELP ME!"  
He caught the attention of one of the men in Hanji's troop, who dropped down beside Jean and felt for that same pulse, that same pulse that Jean could listen to for the rest of his days. The unnamed man turned to another, this one a woman wearing glasses and a blond braid that looked too long for her small body.  
"He's alive. We can make it if we act now."  
"I'll call ahead."  
What happened next grew to be a blur, he watched as they listed Marco onto a guernsey, ordering horses for fast transport. He never let go of Marco's hand as they rode to the Survey Corps main facilities. The trees melded into one another, the clouds drifted carelessly, and Marco's heart beat remained constant. Every sight and sound and smell meant nothing as long as he felt that heartbeat, faint like a butterfly.  They arrived fasted than Jean could imagine and despite his screams, they took Marco from him.   
"What are they-"  
"It's a programme by Zoe, she's found a way to repair damaged limbs... maybe she can fix your friend."  
"Don't say fixed! He's not some replaceable machine-"  
"Yes he is. We all are."  
Jean had to be held back by three people as they carted Marco away, all of them telling him that this gave Marco a fighting chance, but all Jean wanted was to be there. What if he lost him, what if Marco-  
"LET GO OF ME!" he screamed into the night, but they wouldn't yield.  
It was two days before Jean could see Marco. At first, Jean had to look away, the sight was too surreal to take in. Marco's body, or at least half, was replaced with robotics. His arms and leg and chest...and face, all of it metal. His eye was now a milky grey but moved like one would expect an eye to, his metal arm was curled in a fist and radiated heat to the patch beneath it. Someone, a nameless face, explained that they had managed to attach it all to the frayed nerve endings remaining in Marco, and mimicked the damaged internal organs through genetic enhancements, essentially creating their own. They hadn't managed to fully reconstruct Marco's face, parts too caved in to touch without causing damage to the remainder of nerves. The metal reached through his ribcage, meaning Marco was more metal than human. Jean touched the metal, expecting it to burn him but instead it was cool to the touch. He could feel the thrum of the inner workings, the valves and pumps insuring his blood flow remained normal, just like the thrum of the wall.   
"Jean-"  
"Shh Marco, it's okay."  
"Jean, I-"  
"I'm here Marco, just rest."

"Jean!"  
Marco's voice brought him back to the present, and for a moment Jean felt dizzy but refrained from putting his head between his legs. He looked at the boy with wide eye before realising where he was. Sometimes, his memories felt all to real. As if he was experiencing them all over again.   
"What did you say?"  
"I was saying you'd never answered my question. Why aren't you sleeping?"  
He handed him a mug of warm hot chocolate and Jean could only sip politely. Since the metal reconstruction, Marco could no longer digest that much food or liquid and so was limited, but old habits die hard and Jean noticed the spare mug hidden behind the hay.   
"Oh just...just Mikasa. I just can't get her out of my mind."  
"Well if that's all," Marco shrugged, before looking up. But Jean knew the other boy didn't believe him. "Life in the Military Police is boring Jean," he smirked, "so boring."  
"Still, it's safer than out there."  
"Not really. In the Survey Corps, you learn how to face titans. Hidden behind the Walls, pretending to be soldiers, how could we possibly fight?"  
"Hey, you're job isn't to fight. It's to protect the -  
"-King yes I know. And I'm thankful of that, but... I don't want to do nothing. So I'm coming."  
"Where?"  
"On the expo."  
The mug smashed to the ground, but Jean remained still. His mind whirled with numerous responses all of which did not even hint at how badly he wanted to scream at that moment, to slap Marco and beg him to see how foolish that would be. "No," was all he could say. "I almost lost you once-"  
"I'm sorry Jean but I have to."  
"No you don't."  
"I can't do this any more Jean. There are only so many smiles I can fake, so many times I can watch you ride away and not know if you'll come back. I will not be a burden any more. I am not weak, I am not broken and I will fight for humanity."  
"That's all well and good Marco but look at yourself, you're in no condition to fight-"  
"I'll train."  
"There isn't enough-"  
"I don't care Jean I'll find a way. I'm sick of you looking at me like I'm broken, like I'm fragile! If you can look me in the eyes and tell me you  don't then I won't go."  
Jean wished he could, he willed his mouth to utter the sentence they both knew would be a lie but he couldn't. Words of despair and love were lost on his lips, begs and pleas, hopes for tomorrow died on his tongue. He wanted to make Marco to understand that in those few moments he thought he had lost him, his heart cracked. He wanted to make him realise that knowing Marco was safe and alive spurred him forward, but he hung his head in shame and watched Marco walk away.   
"How many people get a second chance?" he whispered, once more into the silent air.   
But this time, no one responded. 

(...) 

Mikasa slammed against the ground, her body aching from the brutal blow as she hit against the thin mat. Levi looked down at her, probably the first time he had ever physically looked down at someone, and reached out his hand, "That's enough for today." She reached up, her fingers interlocking with his, and gripped tightly. In any other sense, people would deem this to me a romantic gesture, one where she never wished to let go of Levi, but that was never the case with Mikasa. She pulled down hard, sending Levi hurtling to the ground, his body slamming against the ground just as she had done, before twisting his arm around as she rushed to her feet and pushing down. She dug her knee into his back and felt him wriggle beneath her. If he wanted, he could break free of her, but both of them knew he was going to yield.   
"Now it's enough."  
She pushed against him once more before leaning off, releasing him from her hold and stretching out. Sweat drenched her body like a second skin and her muscles ached from the endless work-out that had started from dawn and ended at dusk, with only three half hour breaks interspersed between - time she had spent teaching Eren more about the gear. Her body was thankful for the meagre rest it would receive when she headed back to her bed, not intending to move until the morning.   A few days until the expedition and Mikasa had planned out her course of action. She'd be with Eren at all times, even if it meant disobeying Erwin's orders, she wouldn't take the risk of losing him. Working with Levi had improved her stamina, and she felt stronger each day. As she looked at him on the ground, he too was covered in sweat, his hair sticking to the front of his forehead and his shit clinging his muscles. For a moment, he looks younger, though there was no doubt his height helped with that too, and she wondered what he was like when he was younger. What turned him into the distant man he was today.   
They trained in one of the glass halls, left in the middle of a grassy field, with a view of the stables in the distance. Sunlight would gently break through glass barriers and illuminate the otherwise silver room which carried the scent of industrial disinfectant. Levi groaned as he stood, wiping imaginary dust off his trousers before listing his bottle of water and draining a third of it in half a swig. It seemed that Levi wanted them to push their bodies to the limit, that he was training himself just as much as he was training Mikasa and for a moment she was thankful, clenching her fists to her sides and bowing her head. She'd never tell him how thankful she was aloud. There had been talk of Erwin wanting Mikasa and Levi to lead to groups to the main sector of the walls, protecting Eren from oncoming titan  -a task she relished. She was not a leader, she was a fighter. Despite her efforts to have Kirschtein take her place, she remained with the task.   
"Am I dismissed?" Her voice, even though she spoke in a subdued tone, sounded like a gunshot in the otherwise still room.   
"I changed my mind. It's time to see how you'd fair in battle."  
"We've been training for hours."  
Levi drained his bottle and placed it on the ground before turning on his heel, glaring at her as he moved over. Though he was shorter, he commanded an air of authority and grace that made him seem 6ft tall. "Do you think the titans would give you a break?"  
"No."  
"Tell me this, if Eren was being taken by a titan but you'd been fighting for hours would you take a break before finding him?"  
"Of course not."  
"Then shut up, and take your mark on the third platform."  
Mikasa did as instructed, pulling on her gear, weighing her down on top of her heavy, sweat covered clothes. She moved to the third metal ridge in the hall, the hight of a 13m, and watched as Levi programmed the hologram. Each training building held the program, though not as impressive as that in the main building. The image flickered, a green blur that morphed into a grotesque titan, it's lips pulled back in a snarl and it's wide eyes zeroed in on her. It's head was disproportionally larger than it's thin body, and it raised it's arm like a child. She didn't feel any fear, just the rush of adrenaline and thrill one gets from killing such a creature.   
But then the image changed.   
The titan morphed once more, growing in size, it's face shrinking, muscles forming on it's otherwise fat stomach, and roared into the air, shaking the foundation. She knew him, from the moment the hologram stabilised.   
Eren's titan form.   
"Kill him."  
"No."  
"Kill him or humanity suffers."  
"Let it."  
"Ackerman, you are a soldier-"  
"I don't give a fuck."  
"Then I'll do it."  
She watched as Levi, armed with only the blade of a single sword he had brought in with them during training. He swung it with ease, the blade glinting in the pale sunlight. SHe knew it was a hologram, she knew that this wouldn't hurt Eren but something stirred in her. All Levi was doing was showing her that he would hurt Eren, if he was given the order... and Mikasa wouldn't let that happen.   
She kicked from the platform and spun in perfect rotation, landing on her feet with ease just as Levi swung his blade. She however, had gear, and could move faster than even the "great Levi" and shot through the room, sending her gear into the ceiling. She flew towards him with her legs extended and slammed him into the wall before dropping down. His sword clattered to the ground, landing at titan Eren's feet.   
"What do you think you're doing?"  
"Protecting my brother," she barked before clicking her blade into positing and spinning so that it was aimed at his neck. He smirked at her. He'd never make it so easy. So blinded by rage, Mikasa hadn't notice Levi's leg, and just as she moved, he knocked her to the ground, pressing his foot down on her neck. She let her blade drop and clawed at the foot, he was cutting her airways and she felt precious breath drift from her mouth. Finally, she'd found her balance, and kicked her lower half upwards, so that her knees connected with Levi and knocked him to the ground. He fell over her just as she managed to kick his crotch before flipping to her feet. She turned and raised a fist, but he blocked her blows. Levi was nimble, he could move quicker and with more agility, but Mikasa was lighter, and had the harder drive, locating her unmarked spots moments before Levi could defend himself. He was not gentle with her, and Mikasa could see his aim was to knock her to the ground. He was heavier, it wouldn't be hard in theory, but Mikasa wasn't going to lose to him again. She grabbed his fist just as he reached to punch her again and spun, her leg connecting with his face before titan Eren roared, and knocked the two of them apart. The holograms were advanced, and caused injury with the less focused pupils - there was no stopping this one. She couldn't speak to Eren, so she had to shut down the hologram. With Levi still on the ground, Mikasa ran to the control panel and clicked the programme off before Levi coould reach the blade he had gotten up to grab.  
"I win," Mikasa smugly laughed.   
The two of them were breathing heavily. Even though it wasn't the most explosive of fights, their bodies were already too tired and ached from the sudden burst of movement. Mikasa glared at Levi, even if this was a test - he was on her last nerve. If he went too far, she'd have no problem slitting his throat.   
"Listen Ackerman, you may not agree with my methods-"  
"I do not."  
"-but, I am doing this for you. Learn to control your emotions. Had I not been lenient, you would have lost both yours and Jaegar's life. Focus your strength, keep your goal in mind but don't let it consume you. It's your self control that separates us from the animals."   
"I thought it was the opposable thumbs," she muttered as the turned to walk away. 


	5. Cast Away

Eren tapped his fingers mindlessly against the table in some form of pattern and Mikasa did not manage to tear her eyes away from the sight. His nails were chipped, and the underside stained with the mud he had fallen into during their last training session. With only one day before departure to the Wall, there was a tense state running throughout the camp. Some spoke of the military police coming to speak with Commander Erwin and Pixis, and others said the budget for the expedition was halved meaning that their would be little money left to spend on medical attention. The sunlight filtered through the wide windows and Mikasa could barely keep her gaze forward as Hanji ran through new additions to the 3DMG - grappling hooks made of titanium, a slot to hold small knives for up close combat should the time require it, and most importantly - a gun holster with additional weapon slotted at the back for easy access. Mikasa had already become acquainted with it all during her session with Levi and he had instructed her to wear modified gloves, which also held miniature blades across the arm. It made her arms feel heavier and it took time to adjust to the additional weight but she never complained, all it meant was that she was ready should anyone attempt to touch her brother.   
"Mikasa, you okay?"  
It was Armin, bringing her from her thoughts. He had changed more so than most in the past few years, she didn't think of him as weak - she never had really - but it seemed as though he grew more and more confident in his intelligence and ideas. She'd seen him working with Hanji and Erwin over the past few weeks in plans to organise the next strike, and in a way she was proud.   
"Yeah, just a little tired - I was up before sunrise." It was not entirely a lie, her body did lack sleep but it didn't deter her from anything. She just had too much on her mind. Today was the intended test day, where all in the Survey Corps would be evaluated on their skills with the new gear as well as other aspects. Their riding speed and strength was also to be tested in a serious of "challenges" one of which included landing on a moving horse prior to using gear. Another was a one-on-one fight, to ensure most were up to the standards of the Corps. Anyone who did not meet the requirements was to be left in the camp to train before joining the Corps on the second part of the mission - the journey to the basement.  Mikasa could see Levi from outside the window, sending another soldier to the ground with a swift upper-cut, before twisting his body and using the base of his foot foot to hold the soldier's position. Beside him stood Mike with a clipboard, scribbling away furiously. Mikasa was not subject to these tests, and the fact irritated her. She wanted nothing more than to punch Levi and have everyone see. With a nudge from Armin, she returned her focus to the front of the hall. Much like all structures, it was metal with velvet cushions in place of seats, and each raised row of pupils made the room seem like a lecture hall. The board was more of a projected hologram, formulated to show the most information at once. Erwin stalked into the room, hushing the faint murmur that carried through the room. Beside her, Eren stiffened and straightened his back, leanign forward as if to learn the most he could.   
"Corps, today you will be put through your paces and tested to see if you are worthy enough to join the mission. Some will remain behind, and train with the military polices new recruits, and those of you which act so abysmal may be asked to leave."   
That caused a stir, the Corps was already so small that sending those home would be a foolish mistake, but the look on the Commanders face had shown he was not doing this for a reaction - he was serious. This was their final strike, they had to win.   
"We are Humanity's final chance, and we must not let down our brothers and sisters within the Walls. Too many have died, too many have suffered - we will not longer become the titans prey. Now move."  
The room collectively stood and filed out in silence, everyone to focused on Erwin's words to speak. Except Connie, who muttered to Sasha something Mikasa could not make out - though she noticed him mimicking a bow and arrow.   
"Ackerman, you're needed." Erwin's voice made both she and Eren stop dead in the row, causing Jean to comically crash into them both. It would have been funny in any other situation.  "Levi wishes to see you. Eren, you may go with Armin to the training room. The two of you need to work on your combat."  
"I'm going with them," Mikasa protested.   
Erwin was much taller than she, and his face showed no hint of kindness or understanding. He was handsome, and she could see why some in the Corps would speak of his features, but she wanted to knock him to the ground. His eyes held something she did not understand - something in his past that made him separate himself from his humanity.   
"Your Lieutenant requires you, go now. Please. I assure you, it will be an hour at most."  
She groaned under her breath before saluting the Commander stiffy and watching as Eren and Armin walked away. As she walked out, Hanji was awaiting her and smiled as she began walking through the halls. The building was simple, a mirage of metals and glass kept in pristine conditions, no pictures or decorations dare taint the image of stark perfection but there was no denying the constant thrum of the building, the clicking of the clocks and the ticks of the machines - just like the wallls, it was alive. Hanji led Mikasa to the door of the basement and discretely entered in the code before the doors slid open.   
"This is where I leave you, Levi should be there by now."  
"What is this about?"  
"It's better he explain. Have fun!" Hanji called before walking away, leaving Mikasa alone at the open door.   
"This is fucking-" she stopped herself and walked through, the entire stairwell lit in bright white light and the walls kept so pure it looked like untouched snow. he heard faint mumblings, and Levi's voice carried towards her. She wondered if this was another training exercise, or if he just liked causing her irritation. She reached the end of the room and looked around, to see an entire lab. People in white coats glued to screens that were blurred with numbers and letters she did not have time to comprehend. Behind a glass partition stood the familiar crystal that was home to the silent Annie. She looked as though she was sleeping, as if she was never in battle, and her stern face looked softer than usual. Someone sat in a chair beside her, scribbling down her vitals and occasionally altering one of the machines hooked up to the crystal. There was an assumption that there was nothing to be done in order to aid Annie whilst she was "under" but still UV's were attached and her life signs were checked around the clock. Of course, this was to ensure that they could one day question Annie, but if Mikasa hadn't known that she'd have almost thought it considerate. Levi sat at one of the computers, still in his training clothes from the tests, and was focused on staring at the partition as if he could summon Annie to him. Mikasa often wondered what Annie was thinking, if she could think. Did she notice many of her old friends standing guard, did she think the room was too loud and smelt of bleach and a think lemony scent obviously thought to mask the sterile smell. She wondered if Annie found if too bright, or was she just in blissful darkness. Was she lonely?   
"Ackerman, you've arrived."  
"I don't appreciate being taken from my brother unless it's necessary. What is it? You know I know nothing of science."  
"Nor do I brat, but I know something about living."  
Mikasa rolled her eyes and dropped into the seat next to him. She remembered a time where she sat with Eren on at edge of the Wall, watching the stars in the distance, and he felt it the right time to mention that if someone were to rearrange the name "Levi" they'd get the word "Live." She'd felt compelled to leave then and there.   
"So what is it?"  
"What do you know about Leonhart."  
"Annie was one of the best in the 104. I had no idea... look what does it matter. Annie was one of the best fighters, that's all I know. Now why am I here?"  
Levi leaned forward and stared at her, his eyes void of humour and something dark and tense filling his gaze.   
"Because, she's awake."

(...)

Jean knocked Connie to the ground and flipped over him, grabbing his two wrists and pinning him to the ground. He lifted his head and smirked at Mike, as if he was awaiting praise from the soldier. As he flashed his teeth, Connie lifted his knee and kicked Jean in the groan, causing the soldier to roll on the ground and twist in pain as Connie lept from the ground and took a bow to the crowd.   
"I keep forgetting the fucking legs," Jean snarled as he stood, gripping his stomach. "Not fair Connie, I use those-"  
"We all know you don't," laughed the other boy before walking over to Mike. The older soldier wrote down on his clipboard before nodding to the two of them, "You pass. Next!"  
Jean stepped from the ring, ignoring Connie's gloating eyes, and stood beside Marco. The other boy bit down on his lip, watching at the next two soldiers got into place. Despite Jean's efforts to stop him, Marco was determined to come on the expedition, and Jean knew that if he did he'd only watch out for his friend. Jean couldn't shut his eyes without seeing the dying Marco, laying on the street, what if it happened again? He noticed that he stood too close to Marco, their arms pressed together even though both had plenty of room to move. He needed to Marco, but more importantly he needed to know he was safe.   
"Bodt, get in there."  
He gave Jean a weak smile before moving to the ring. For the first time in his life, Jean hoped Marco would lose. 

(...)

"What do you mean she's awake!?"  
"She's awake, what else is there?"  
"She doesn't look awake."  
The two of them stand alone with only Annie in her crystal for company. Levi ordered everyone outside and they did so with only faint murmurs of irritation. Must be nice to have power. "At 11.23 this morning, her hand moved. In the next hour, her toes moves and her nose twitched. She's waking up."  
"Isn't she secure here?"  
"Yes, but there's more to this Ackerman." He looked around the room, watching each of the bustling white coats going about their results before pulling her towards him, "Someone tampered with the results. As if they didn't want us to know she'd woken up."  
"Why are you telling me this?"  
"Because, for some stupid reason I trust you."  
Mikasa knew little about her Heichou, only that he was the sort to keep to himself, the sort to only rely on his abilities rather than others. For him to admit he trusted her...she must have done something right. She searched his face, under his eyes were dark half moons that grew darker by the day, and she noticed his right eye had popped a vein. No surprise there, he shouted at her with such a passion during training that she'd expected it. His face had paled slightly, and his hair looked longer than it had before. Maybe it was the upcoming mission, or the fact that now they were dealing with a high-wire titan, but something had changed in him. "What do I do?"  
"Set up watches, make sure there are two people here at all times. Don't tell them she's waking up, because someone out there knows. And we can't have them finding out we're on to them."  
"What are you doing?"  
He tapped the desk and pushed away, straightening his jacket as if he was preparing to wear a mask. "I'm going to speak to Erwin."  
He left without another word, and she watched him climb silently up the stairs as if he was a ghost. No one but her saw him leave.  She wondered if that was a bonus of being small, to be hidden away from others, safe in the shadows with your movements silent. Maybe he liked the peace and quiet.  The thrum of the labs brought her back to reality and away from thoughts of Levi. She looked through the partition, watching the stoic and silent Annie. What would happen when she woke? Would she attack, or cooperate. Is she scared of what will happen...   
 _Fall, Annie._  
The words rung in her head, like the echo of a drum beat and brought everything in the room to life. She smelt the bleach as it burned through her nostrils, the lights grew brighter and brighter until she could barely focus. Annie was awake.   
And no one knew what she would do.   
  


(...)

"So what if you lost? It's no big deal, you still passed."  
"That's not the point Marco," Jean groaned as he landed on a pile of hay, covering his face with his aching hands. His body throbbed continuously and he felt himself getting light headed.  "Ymir fights dirty that's all."  
"She's pretty good Jean, you shouldn't beat yourself up-" he stopped when he saw Jean's scowl and blushed before turning away.   
The tests had been gruelling, three rounds of fighting, a four mile run before a 3DMG test. It made sense as to why, but he felt himself aching from the stress of it all. Marco on the other hand had seemed to have no issues. He lost his first fight and drew in his second but managed to win the third, he also didn't find running difficult since his body was mainly lightweight machinery.   
"You know Jean, a great leader isn't determined through strength."  
He looked at Marco with a smile before staring at his palm. He imagined Marco's blood still on it, drenching his flesh. For a moment, he imagined never washing it off... if he'd lost him he didn't know what he'd do.   
The stables were silent, and Jean felt the usual swell in his hear when he sat next to Marco. They were alone, in the safety of what had become their favourite place to talk, with no one to interrupt them.  Tomorrow, they'd be heading out for the mission, and all Jean could think was that it might be the last time he ever saw Marco. He breathed in and out, as if he was trying to memorize everything about their surroundings so that there were burned into his mind.   
"Jean-"  
He didn't let Marco finish, instead his lips gently pressed against the other boy's. It was different to every other kiss Jean had had. It was sweet and soft, but hard and metallic at the same time. His hands snaked along Marco's neck, pulling him in closer. The metal was cool to the touch and he could feel every part of the boy, a live and so so vibrant that it almost made him giddy. Marco relaxed into the kiss, and it grew deeper and deeper until it was as if they had been fulfilling a hunger. All the lingering looks, all the days of wonder and hope, all the time spend imagining being in one another's arms was answered as their kiss grew. Jean moaned against Marco's lips, unable to hold anything in. Marco's fingers knotted into his hair, and the two of them pressed together so tightly it was as if they were trying to mould into the same being. Jean ached for more, his heart pounding at the thought of kissing Marco's neck and feeling him shudder in delight...but then the announcement went.  
"ALL SURVEY CORPS TO THE MAIN HALL. REPEAT, ALL SURVEY CORPS TO THE MAIN HALL."  
Jean let go of Marco, clearly reluctant, and kept his begs of  _no one will notice if we're not there_ to himself. Marco was bright red and his hair tousled making him look strangely younger. Jean doubted he looked much better and quickly smoothed down what he could before Marco suggested they go. He wondered if he should take his hand... _it's not like there's a manual for what to do after you kiss your best friend,_ he thought.   
The main hall was different to the many others. Erwin stood with Levi at the front of a stage with the other veterans of the Corps seated behind them. High metal levels allowed there to be seating on many levels and Jean wondered if the Survey Corps had ever filled it entirely, or if there were just too many deaths. He took a seat beside Marco, hidden in the corner, and rested his feet on the chair in front.   
"Jean, move."  
Eren glared down at him before gesturing to the feet. He didn't respond but instead made an irritated look before complying. He'd have taken the chance to annoy Eren, but not tonight. Not when there was so much tension in the room.   
"There has been a change in our plans," Erwin began, "we must postpone our intended mission."  
A surge of irritated voices filled the room but Jean could only focus on how Erwin clenched his fists, losing a hint of his calm demeanour. Something important must have happened, especially to put him on such edge. "We are sending a group out however, to check the Wall's maintenance and ensure Scouting Leader Hange's plans may come to fruition. There will be 60 soldiers on this mission, your names are written outside. And may I call Cadets Arlert, Ackerman and Kirschtein to remain. That is all."  
"Me? Why do you think-"  
"No idea, but good luck whatever it is," Marco smiled and gave Jean a kiss on the cheek before squeezing back him. Despite everything, Jean felt himself blush and raised a hand to feel the warmth of his skin.   
It took thirty minutes for the Corps to clear the building, leaving six people behind: Levi, Erwin, Hange, Mikasa, Jean and Armin. Jean sat next to Armin who for he first time in a while, looked a little confused. Erwin was strong in his stance, and stood like a true leader with a straight back and a thoughtful gaze. Hange sat next to Levi on the edge of the stage, her legs swinging over the edge while Levi sat cross-legged, drinking a cup of tea in the odd manner that had become his custom.   
"As the three of you know, the Survey Corps is a dangerous section of the army. We have the highest mortality rates, even though we have the fewest recruits, and so we feel the time has come to name our successors. In the event of our deaths, you three are to take our roles."  
Jean could feel Armin tensing beside him, and he couldn't blame the boy. It made no sense, not unless Erwin didn't think he'd die for at least another five years, or they were all desperate.   
"Aren't we too young?" Armin finally asked.  
"Definitely not, and there's nothing wrong with young leaders. Especially the three of you."  
"He's right Armin! Plus, you guys will have all these new ideas and young blood!! Ahhh, but we aren't planning on dying straight away," winked Hange.  
"Know this however, you will not assume these roles until the age of twenty. In the event of  _my_ death, Hange will be made 14th Commander of the Corps."  
The seemed to be news to Hange, who gasped loudly and turned to Levi, who was taking another sip of tea. "Ackerman, since you and the Corporal have grown to be so close in training, and how you two are the greatest soldiers in our armada, you will shadow Levi. Armin, you will shadow Hange and learn her methods of research and planning. Kirschtein, you're with me."  
The others filed out of the room leaving Jean alone with Erwin. In the silence of the hall, Erwin seemed both heroic and magnificent, as he did terrifying. "Why me?" was all Jean could muster.   
"I hear you lead a troop through Rose to safety with minimal deaths, and that sounds like a promising leader to me. You are not the strongest Jean, nor are you the smartest, but you are the only cadet I can see leading humanity back to its glory."  
Jean couldn't move as Erwin left the room, and he was stuck with his echoing thoughts. 


	6. Next in Line

"I'm not happy about this Erwin."  
Levi sat cross-legged on the Commander's bed, his cup of tea perched on his knee while his thumb thoughtfully tapped the handle. Much like most of the world inside the Walls, Erwin's room was awash with whites, and metals and glass. The window took around a quarter of the back wall and looked out to the forest, his walls were a white, the colour of fresh and untouched snow; without a single poster or map to decorate them aside from a framed image of the Corps logo which hung about a dark, oak chest of drawers which held three frames - one was of Levi, Erwin and Hanji, taken years ago; another was of a young chubby boy and a handsome man with a thoughtful gaze looking out onto the distance; the last was of Erwin's squad, with Mike standing in the centre. Aside from that, Erwin had little personal possessions on show, and Levi knew that if he were to look through one of the bedside drawers, he'd find more, but he respected Erwin's privacy. Since they had first arrived, Levi had liked seeking refuge in Erwin's room: it was secluded with no one to bother him, and it was incredibly clean aside from the maps which had once spilled on top of the desk across from the bed. Since Levi's visits grew more frequent, Erwin made a point of keeping everything stacked in order.  
"Wow, well I am surprised. Usually you agree with everything I say," Erwin muttered whilst scribbling on his pad.  
"Because I trust in your decisions, but I don't want Ackerman shadowing me-"  
"Why not? You spend enough time training her." Levi felt the blood rushing to his cheeks and turned away before Erwin would see him blush. "Plus, she is aware of the Leonhart situation, so that means-"  
"Do you intent on telling Jean?"  
Erwin dropped his pen and leaned back in his chair, "No, personally I don't think someone so young can be trusted with this information. Especially since someone has tampered with results. But if you trust Ackerman, that's enough for me."  
Levi took a long sip of his tea and leaned against the wall. They'd been discussing the issues with the delay to the mission; the issues that would arise with the Military Police who would no doubt have questions, but all Erwin could muster was a loud sigh. They had to move out soon, it was something both men understood well, but with the changes in Annie it would be difficult.   
"We could bring her with us," Erwin muttered. "We know the life-support systems are basically useless, and she's waking up. It's better we get her to the compound in Maria, it's titanium, 20ft tall, she can't hurt anyone. Whereas if we're here, she'll be able to."  
"Sounds like a good idea, I'll find Hange and see if she can work out a method of transport."  
"Nothing by air. Last time we tried, the titans brought it down."  
Levi remembered the situation well, they'd sent a helicopter with thirteen troops to transport supplies - a titan had thrown a tree and sent the helicopter smashing into Trost.  Erwin refused to use air travel ever again. Horses were the main mode of transport, though others has tried to produce robotic counter parts. The cars produced would cost too much to produce, and keep functional - it wasn't like there were a plethora of oil refinery's,  and the metal horses moved too slowly, and also cost too much. Usually, things would be carried by cart, though with Annie, Levi feared a more technical approach was needed. He drained the rest of his tea and placed it on the tray beneath the bed, before giving a room and leaving the room. He could see the Commander was too busy to hear his demands to be removed by the shadow-project, though really he didn't mind. Mikasa was one of the better cadets, and despite her attitude - she was one of humanity's strongest.  
The hallways were empty as  he stepped out, the temperature instantly cooler, and he leaned against the wall staring at the metal slabs in front.  
Sooner of later, they'd head for the Walls. And more people were going to die.

(...)

"Do you think she's concious?"  
Jean chewed the end of his pen as he stared at the piece of paper in front. He'd been trying to figure out why Erwin had chosen him, and most of the page consisted of crossed out words such as , "valour" "honour" "dashing good lookings." Armin had ignored Jean's request for help and instead, had focused on Annie in her crystal state. When Mikasa has led them down after the meeting with Hange, Erwin and Levi, she had only said the patrol on Annie was to be increased, that they were worried someone had tampered with information. They hadn't bothered asking any more questions, and took their places behind one of the computers looking out to Annie's silent state. Armin had spent the first ten minutes pacing in front of her, watching her intently through the partition, before checking her stats over and over and over.  
"Maybe she can see us, maybe she knows we're here. Don't you think Jean?"  
"She's not awake Armin, I doubt she can."  
"No, but I...I heard when someone is in a coma they can sense when others are there. They can hear everything."  
"Sure, but I don't think anyone has ever written if someone in a crystal can sense others."  
 When he saw the hurt flash across Armin's face, he could only give an apologetic smile before turning back to the sheet of paper. There was nothing he could say, he thought, to make Armin feel better. Around them, people in white coats mumbled to one another before once more returning to examine Annie, whispering to one another. Jean could only imagine there was so much to say about a silent body. "Have you tried talking to her?"  
The idea seemed ludicrous to him, but it seemed to light up Armin's eyes and he nodded with excitement, "Can you come with me?"  
"Fine, why not."  
He stood with belligerence and followed the small blond boy who quickly typed in the code to open the glass door and let them in. The white coats stared at them for a moment before filing out the room as it if to give privacy. Jean knew they could all see, and knew there were probably microphones so anything they said could be heard.  It was much colder in here, and Annie looked so young under the light. Her surrounding crystal was tinted blue and glistened under the light, as if it was pure. He leaned against the wall as Armin sat down beside her, looking up at her solemn face. She looked like she was sleeping.   
"Annie...I don't know if you can hear me," Armin began, "but I want you-I  _hope_ you wake up. Because, despite everything, I still think you're good. You just need a chance to explain, but I know if you do then people will listen. We need you Annie, please wake up."  
She didn't respond, and the two cadets kept her company for the next two hours. 

(...)

"It's a big honour Mikasa."  
"I know, I just don't like him."  
"Really, that's so surprising. I always thought you did," chuckled Eren as he dropped down beside her. "Captain Levi is incredible you know, you should be grateful."  
"An incredible pain in the ass, maybe." She bit down on her lip to stop from smirking. The two of them sat on the edge of the Wall, looking out at the expanse. No one knew when they'd leave and head for the mission, but it seemed like no one but Erwin was in a rush. Well...Erwin and Eren. Eren had asked Mikasa to help him with his fighting, and she reluctantly accepted, teaching him everything Levi had taught her. It was simple really, Eren was stronger than most gave him credit for. They'd decided to leave it after a while, both their bodies drained from the mass of exercise, and opted to sit and watch the distance. Mikasa pulled her out and wrapped some around Eren to protect him from the chill. He didn't argue and snuggled in close to her. For a moment, she imagined they were home, and that at any moment they would be asked to go collect firewood.   
"Ackerman."  
"Oh for-"  
"Capatain Levi!" Eren squeaked, before standing to attention with his fist over his heart. He gestured for Mikasa to join and she stood slowly and followed in his command. Levi nodded curtly and Eren stood straight, before flashing Mikasa a smile and disappearing. She wished she could follow.   
"We need to train you using a horse-"  
"I can ride a horse."  
"But can you jump from a horse and swing up to a titan before landing back on your horse without ruining formation?"  
"No-"  
"If you're going to be my shadow Ackerman, you're going to need to fight like me."  
"I think I'm too tall for that."  
He didn't laugh as he turned on his heel, and she had no choice to follow. On their descent, she saw Eren give her a tight nod with a look that said  _behave._

They stood in the training hall, and Mikasa perched on top of a mare called Shadowfax, who demanded treat after treat. She could see Levi standing beside the control panel, his face in its usual solemn state as he pressed in the code. He'd informed her of what she was to do, take out the titans with minimal deaths, she hadn't questioned it though she found it unbelievable that there would be any. Levi sat on the ledge, his legs dangling over the edge as he pulled the control panel down and gave her a long stare, before clicking the large button. Instantly, the room filled with rain that soaked through her cloak and the smell of metal and blood grew thick in the air. It all turned cold, the chill running along her body with the threat of remaining. Levi seemed un-fazed, and leaned over, watching expectantly. Mikasa tried to ignore the weather, knowing this was Levi's way of testing her. She moved slowly, Shadowfax's hooves the only sound in the metal city which seemed to have grown larger. She could no longer see the glass windows, and Levi had disappeared in the clouds. That's when the hologram moved into position, and the titan roared. It was a small titan, nothing she couldn't handle, though it would be difficult not using the titan's flesh as a purchase. She's have to plan, and use her surroundings.   
"Let's go boy."  
She clicked and the horse drove into action, diverting into a side street. The sound of the titan was as thick as the chill in the air, each step sending vibrations around her. Mikasa turned up another street and the titan jumped out in front, on it's back feet  and ready to pounce like a cat. Mikasa took in a breath and unsheathed her swords, watching at the dull blades illuminated in her touch, she'd kill this titan, and she'd prove she was just as strong as Levi. She squeezed her legs and the horse throttled straight towards the titan, it was about to jump when Mikasa stood on the horses back and jumped, clicking her cear and shooting up to the sky. The titan reached out for her but she dodged it's grip and swung to her side, her body jolting in the sudden change as she pulled back and slashed the titans neck before landing on the opposite building. The titan roared and fell to the ground, when the hologram suddenly disappeared. She waited for the room to return to normal, when she saw three more titans appearing in the distance. Her breathing quickened as she jumped down from the building, just as Shadowfax rode by. She landed on the horses back and kicked, the two of them hurtling off at an incredible speed when she saw him. A man...no a boy, no older than 25, with white hair and a worn face, ride by. She stopped immediately and turned Shadowfax around before following the boy, she saw the Wings of Freedom on his cape, and he didn't seem holographic. He was almost real.   
Finally the boy stopped and jumped off his horse, Mikasa scanned for titans before jumping off her horse and followed the boy as he walked down a hidden corridor. She made sure Shadowfax was hidden and protected from the rain before doing so, diggin out an apple for the horse to nibble on. The boy seemed to know his way around the metal maze, one blade unsheathed as he turned a corner. Mikasa was about to follow when a blade struck out at her.   
"Jesus christ!" the boy exlaimed when he saw her face, "You should be more careful."  
"Who..." she had never seen this boy before, but there was something in his eyes. What had he seen? "Who are you?"  
"I'm the stuff of Levi's nightmares," laughed the boy before dropping the blade. "The name's Farlan. Come on, we need to find Isabelle."  
"Isabelle?"  
"Yeah, she was on the Wall but something's different, something's happened. Damn it, we were supposed to stick together."  
"What are you-"  
Before she could finish, the boy disappeared. Mikasa wondered if she should head back to Shadowfax but something told her to keep moving forward. 

(...)

Levi stared at the screen in horror, watching as Farlan's face appeared in screen. He hadn't realised what codes he'd inserted, he hadn't even thought, but now Mikasa could see them. Now she'd know.   
 _I'm the stuff of Levi's nightmares.  
_ He wasn't wrong. Every dream was filled with their faces. The past obscured the future and brought rage and grief down upon him like a never ending flame. He'd lost his family, and now he was going to watch them die again and again until they were one day saved. He wondered if he was mad, to repeat the same loss again and again. There was a fine line between madness and comfort. 

(...)

Two titans dropped to the ground as Mikasa and Farlan ran onto a side street, watching as the holograms crashed to the ground an disappeared. The rain felt sharp against her skin and she wondered how Farlan felt. He didn't seem as affected as she did, and clicked his blades away as the sound of titans thrummed around them.   
"Two thirteen metres, that's nothing," smiled the white haired boy.   
"True, but we should be careful," Mikasa warned. "We take them down and head for the-!" She stopped as the sound of another titan rang, and a fifteen meter appeared in front of them. "Take down the thirteen metres first, we'll work together on that one."  
They worked quickly, and Mikasa felt the whirl of wind and rain rushing against her as her blades slices through the air with precision.  She spun her body rround and headed for the fifteen metre as she heard the sound of the other titans crumbling to the ground. It swiped and Mikasa ducked down before spinning at it's ankle, cutting the artery's. The titan fell to it's knees as Farlan jumped over and slashed it's neck. She smiled briefly at the other boy as the landed on the ground before scanning the area. More titans were on their way, but Mikasa couldn't tell how many.  
"Farlan, we need to get to the Wall."  
"You don't want to take them out?"  
"No, we get to the Wall and find your friend. Okay?"  
Before he could respond, she ran back down the way they came, her breath out in short painful breaths. Shadowfax rode into view and she gave the horse a quick pat before mounting. As the moved forward, Farlan rode out with his horse. "Do you know where the Wall is?" The maze of metal had made her mind a blur, but she knew they had to escape. Farlan nodded and led her down a path. He seemed to know his way around better than she, as if he lived in the metal contraption himself. Mikasa bit on her lip, is this a test? Did Levi do this on purpose  to test her courage. She knew she couldn't be hurt, and that Farlan could hold his own, but they'd be safer at the Wall.   
The rode hard and fast, metal blurring past them when suddenly.   
"BIG BROOOOOTHER!"  
Mikasa stopped dead as a small brunette girl jumped from a building and sliced through a titan's neck. Farlan jumped off his horse and prepared his blade before shoooting upwards. Mikasa followed him a second later. He was so focused on the girl that he didn't see the titan reaching for him, Mikasa shouted his name as she pulled out the blades and sliced, sending the hologram to the ground. She crashed into the building, and felt arms pulling her upwards.   
"He's dead isn't he!?" the brunette whimpered. "I can't find him-"  
"Levi is fine Isabel. But we need to get to the Wall. There's too many."  
"Where is he?"  
"He's fine," Mikasa said sternly. "But we need to get moving." She gestured to her left where four titans, abnormal, where running for them. Isabel clenched her fists and gave Mikasa a curious gaze. All three knew they'd have to fight these titans, but Mikasa couldn't help feel as though she was meant to stop this. Before she could think, Farlan jumped off the building and spun mid-air before shooting upwards, his blades hanging at his side. Isabel followed, jumping to the right and aiming for the titans eyes. Mikasa bit her lip  before following, and jumping mid air, flipping backwards as she sliced through the neck. It was when she landed on the metal ledge that she saw. Farlan was to focused on one titan to see the other, and Isabel was running to him and therefore, ignored the titan behind.   
 _Save them. SAVE THEM._  
Mikasa couldn't shake this feeling, as if these two were real. Within and without. She refreshed her blades and leaned back, timing everything. The titan reached out for Farlan, she shot through the sky.   
The rain stabbed her skin as she raised her blades, opening her arms and grabbed Farlan mid-air, her blades slicing through the titan's hand. She twisted so that he could hold on as she pulled her blades off. Blood trickled down her wrist but she ignored the pain and threw them behind Isabel, the girl ducked as the blades whirled over her head and straight into the left eye of the titan. Mikasa shot down and grabbed the girl before the three of them crashed into a metal landing, breathing hevily as they tried to untangle themselves.   
MIkasa wiped the blood on her shirt and denied Isabel's request to bandage it up. "Go, both of you."  
"There's five-" Farlan began but Mikasa stopped him.   
"Look after her, go to the Wall.  _Now._ "  
Farlan squeezed her shoulder before nodding, and she watched as the two soldiers disappeared to the Walls. Mikasa felt the titans, and decided that it was time, for all her anger to unlease itself. She spun on her heel and screamed into the air, her blades straight as they sliced through two titans necks. She'd kill them all. 

(...)

She saved them.   
She sent them away.   
She did it. She did the impossible.   
Levi tried to convince himself that it was a different setting, that it wasn't related. But he knew, he knew she'd done what he could never achieve.   
It was his pride, not the titans, that killed them. His pride which cut their throats and ripped their lived away.   
Before he could think, Levi clicked through the programmes on the panel and watched with a heavy heart, as the rain cleared. 

(...)

Mikasa breathed heavily as the clouds and shards of rain disappeared, the adrenaline in her body kept her from feeling the pain in her wrist but she felt the bloood and the dull throb of it all. Sooner or later, it'd get infected.  
"Hey! Hey Mikasa!"  
Eren and Armin called her over from one of the metal ledges, smiling and waving. She felt her heart flutter at the sight of her boys, and dropped her blades as she moved forward.  
"Levi must have worked you to the bone!"  
"Is that blood," gasped Eren.  
"I'm-"  
The titan appeared behind them. It's large eyes watching them as though there were a cake in a window display. Mikasa opened her mouth as the titan scooped them up, screaming and fighting, and gripped tightly. She jumped off the ledge, preparing new blades, and shot forward, screaming their names when the titan squezed, sending their blood splattering into the air like confetti. She could feel her tears burning  as she hurled through the air, listening as their screams faded into the whimpering of her name before the titan swallowed them whole. Mikasa screamed their names as the sliced through the titan's neck, relishing in the thought of it dying, and she was so consumed, that she slammed into the metal edge, and fell to the floor. Her body screamed in pain, but she didn't move. She wept onto the metal as she watched the titan fall to it's knees and disappear...a hologram. She stared in disbelief, it had look so  _real!_    
"Ackerman, get up."  
Mikasa slowly sat upwards and looked at Levi as he glared at her, his eyes empty and cold and distant.   
"Why...why would you-"  
"You did not get back on the horse."  
"WHY DID YOU MAKE ME SEE THAT?"  
"You did not get back on the horse."  
He turned away as Mikasa stood, gripping her stomach, and she felt rage broiling through her.   
She looked at her arms, at the arm holsters with hidden blades and bit her lip... dangerous thoughts were not to be toyed with.  __  
I never want to feel that pain again.  
Despite everything, the blood, her aching heart...she remembered a dream, a dream she had hoped to suppress. 


	7. Awoken

The dummy's head dropped hard onto the ground, rolling in a circle before stopping at Eren's feet. He kicked it away with a sigh, allowing Mikasa to roll over and stab her blade through it, before throwing the head to the other end of the room. She wondered how different she'd feel if she was to kill someone real, someone with hopes and dreams and a family...would she be so cold? Mikasa shook those thoughts from her head before knocking down the dummy, and stepped back to see she was now surrounded in a ring of them, each painted with features to resemble Levi: an emotionless look, a tea cup drawn at the stomach, and a cravat crudely drawn in black paint she had found in one of the closets. Eren hadn't been pleased when he saw them, and decided to watch instead of train with her.  
"I don't know Mikasa, what did he do that was so bad?"  
She'd not told him abut the programme, but she found it hard to hide her anger at Levi. If she were to tell him, it'd all seem real.  
"Does it matter? He's evil."  
"No he isn't."  
"Levi is an anagram for evil, doubt that's a coincidence."  
"So you think his parents knew he'd be evil."  
"If he was the spawn of Satan, sure."  
Eren didn't join in with her laughter, though Mikasa could have sworn she'd seen the corner of his lips curl in a smile.  Outside, sunlight filtered through and was their only source of light though at times it faded due to the passing clouds. She wondered what would happen if a titan were to tear through the building at that moment, how would she protect Eren. Often she had thoughts like this, it calmed her to think of all the possibilities.   
"Want to have a shot?"  
Eren lifted one of the decapitated Levi dummies and shook his head, "I think I'm okay."  
"You're missing out, it feels good," she smirked as she set one back into standing position. She twirled on her heel, her blade oustretched as she sliced through it's arms, sneding both falling to the ground, she twirled once more, bending down and slashed at it's knees. As the blades sliced through, and the dummy dropped, she watched the world burn and crash around her. 

(...)

"Jean, maybe you should take him. It's not healthy."  
He could only nod at Krista as he watched Armin sitting beside Annie, speaking to her about every little thing he could. It had been three hours since their shift had ended, but no matter what he said, Armin would not move. He'd told Krista and Ymir that they could leave, but both decided to stay. It was Ymir who decided to flick off the speakers, giving the other two a look that said  _We have no right to listen._ Now, she looked up at Krista, who was sat on her lap, with a look Jean had grown accustomed to, the look of someone in love and unable to hide it. he wondered how long it took for Ymir to feel comfortable enough to show Krista how much she cared, though looking at them you'd have thought they'd been together. For a moment, he thought it was unfair - they'd never have a normal life, not with the titans.   
"I don't want to force him," Jean finally said. "You should have seen him when he first saw her. I've never seen him so..."  
"He doesn't want to let her go," smiled the smaller girl, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing tightly, "makes it easier to cope I suppose."  
They watched as Armin stood, gently tracing his fingers around the crystal. He reminded Jean of a child, clinging to the stories told a lifetime ago. No one dared to interrupt him, not even the white coats who had all decided to leave an hour into Ymir and Historia's shift. Armin pressed his hand flat to the crystal, where Annie's hands lay by her sides, before turning back and looking at his comrades with tear filled eyes. "I don't think this is any easier on him," Ymir said quietly.   
Armin moved to the door when suddenly, the ground shook. The crystal began to ignite in colour, rainbows of bright lights bouncing off the walls. Jean had never seen something so beautiful, such colour and vibrance, that for a moment he forgot what was happening. Annie's eyes burst open, she'd never looked so young. She took in the world around her, her body slowly getting used to the sensation of breathing once more, before she caught sight of Armin.   
"Thank you Armin. I'm so sorry."  
Jean didn't know how he could hear her, it was as if her voice was in his head because he watched Armin reply though he heard so words. Annie shut her eyes once more, returning to her slumber as all the lights faded away.   
Tear's rolled down Armin's face as he watched the crystal.   
Annie was waking up.   
"Fuck," was all Jean could say. 

(...)

 Mikasa's blade dropped to the ground as the building was ripped from the ground, glass shattering around like confetti. She ran to Eren's side, pushing him behind her as she scanned the area, the ground shook and slowly melted into hot ash. Fires burst from the ground, the scent of burning flesh thick and pungent in the air. Everything was destroyed, metal charred with flames and glass strewn, horses running in the distance, and the Walls were not only ripped apart, a third of it was completely smashed to pieces.   
"Get behind me."  
"What is this-"  
"Eren, just get behind me."  
She wielded the blade with one hand and gripped him with the other. The ground shook, and she turned in time to see one of the metal platforms falling towards them. She pushed Eren to the side before jumping out of the way herself, watching as the platform crashed into the ground and melted through. "We need to find Armin," she said quietly. "We need to go."  
The ground still shook, and Mikasa struggled to keep a steady balance. Sweat covered her body, and she felt more and more heavy.   
"Mi-"  
The ground erupted, a giant hand bursting through the ground and grabbing Eren. He screamed his name, tried to reach for his thumb to bite, but the titan rose from the ground. It's large eyes bulging from its ugly face, hair hanging loosely at the sides. It was short, twelve metres maybe, but it's hands were more like claws, sharp and shocking. Eren writhed in it's grip as it lifted him to its lips. Mikasa screamed his name and began charging, she had no gear and only one blade, but she'd find a way. She climbed onto one of the grumbling metal structures, panic rising in her throat. She reached the top when the titan brought Eren to it's lips, and bit him in half. Blood danced in the wind as the lower half of Eren's body fell to the floor. Mikasa screamed, she was unable to keep it in, and she jumped from the structure. She sliced her blade as far as she could before crashing to the ground. She didn't care about the pain, she ran to what remained of Eren. His legs twitched, as though they knew they were detatched. Bile rose in her throat, and she stared down at her blade, steaming with the titan's blood, and raised it to her throat.

(...)

Levi balanced the multiple manilla folders Hange had given to him before leaving the room, with the orders to give them to Erwin as soon as possible. Usually, he'd have ignored her request, but he wasn't in the mood to hear her begging. He walked through the training buildings, eager for the cool air to calm him down. The planning for the expedition was getting to Erwin, who wouldn't let Levi leave rooms until plans were perfected to the letter. It was during these meetings that Erwin would forget his habit of keeping his room neat, and papers would be overflowing from drawers, the mugs piled on corners, causing the Captain feel uncomfortable.   
"MIKASA!"  
Eren's shout stopped him dead, and his sudden stop caused the folders to scatter on the ground. Levi moved to the door and watched as Mikasa dropped from one of the metal ledges onto the ta-tame mats beneath, wielding a blade. As she landed, she looked as though she was crying, though her body convulsed at odd angles. Her blade was a flurry of movements, and then she saw it tip it at her throat. Levi burst through the door and kicked the blade from her hands as soon as he reached her and spared it not thought as it clattered to the ground beneath. He straddled her, pinning her legs to the ground and holding her wrists down. It didn't seem like a panic attack, it was like nothing he'd seen. Eren jumped down beside them, watching his sister with worried eyes, biting on his lip as though he was bursting to shout her name once more.   
"What happened?" Levi asked while being jostled by a still lively Mikasa. In the corner of his eye, he saw multiple beheaded figures and the obvious cravat drawn on each. He'd have almost laughed in another situation.   
"She was training and then she just-"  
Mikasa slowed down, her breathing slowly readjusting. She was whimpering something, but neither could make it out.   
"It's okay Ackerman, you'll be okay. Mikasa?" He touched her face carefully, checking for any scars, but she remained unharmed. She was burning hot, and Levi felt her pulse race as he pressed his fingers to her neck. "Oi Eren, outside there are folders. Pick them up and give them to Erwin."  
"No, not until Mikasa-"  
"I'll take her to the infir-"  
"NO!" Mikasa shouted, her eyes still shut. "No...no doctors."  
"Okay, I'll take her to my room. Now  _go._ "  
Eren gave his sister one last glance before squeezing her hand and adjusting her scarf before hurrying to pick the folders. Levi turned his attention back to Mikasa, trying to ensure she was balanced in his arms. He whispered her name, her first name, over and over to ensure she was still concious as he took her to his rooms. She muttered words such as "fire" and "he's gone" but none of it made sense. She had cooled down slightly, but Levi opted to lay her on top of the bed covers.   
She looked so small, her body still shaking, and he sat beside her.   
"Mikasa, you'll be okay. I'll get some water-"  
"Don't go Levi, not again please."  
She was clearly hallucinating but there was something in her voice, something to insinuate that she had been hurt.   
He stroked the hair from her face, admittedly a tender act for even him, and watched her face. What could she see?  
"Mi-"  
Her eyes flew open, bright and dark, hopeful and lost all at the same time. She looked at him for a moment before grabbing a fistful of his shirt and pulling him closer. Their lips touched, briefly at first, and then she pulled him in closer, bucking her hips as if to give him room. Her lips were soft and sweet, like sugar and smoke. Levi wondered what it would be like to allow himself to be consumed in this kiss, his hands trailing up her chest as she moaned against his lips. It grew deeper and deeper with each passing second, and it was when Mikasa's hands lingers at his buttons that he pulled away. It felt as though he had to rip himself from her, breathing heavily as she looked up at him, dazed for a moment, "Levi-" was all she managed before her eyes shut once more.    
  



	8. Remember

Nothing made sense.   
Memories swirled through her head, but how could you remember something that had never happened?   
She saw Levi kissing her gently, Eren charging the Walls in his titan form, Jean being thrown backwards in a blast as a screaming Marco ran to his broken body. She saw light and dark, happiness and pain and destruction all tumbling in one horrible cascade she could not keep from being thrown into. Mikasa grabbed out for something, anything, a voice or sound or person who could pull her out but she was alone. Then it happened.   
They were in a wasteland, one she had seen before, where the Walls lay open with the electrical wiring laid strewn in the wind. Eren crawled towards her, blood covering his face, smeared like face-paint. "The Wall," he whimpered, "there might be more in the Wall."  
Before she could ask what he meant, there was a loud groan and suddenly the Wall exploded. A titan, larger than she had ever seen before, burst from the metal works, dragging the cogs and springs with it before roaring into the air.   
"I f-failed humanity Mikasa, I lost." Panic filled her throat, she couldn't think or speak, just clutch him tightly as he came to rest on her lap.  "I...I wanted to give you and Armin the world, you know? I-I thought it would make up for what happened with mo-" he coughed, blood spilling from his throat. "I wanted too much, I wanted to save us all."  
"You will."  
"Mikasa, I'm dying."  
"You will fight."  
"Mikasa-"  
"Please don't leave me here. Please don't leave me in a world without you."  
He smiled, a broken and hopeless smile of a man who knew it would be his last. His eyes scanned the skies and for a moment, landed on the titan before turning back to the world. "Save it Mikasa, save the World for me...for Armin...for mom."  
"Eren-"  
"I'm sorry I wasn't the brot-brother you deserved. But remember, you're incredible."  
"No-"  
"I just wish..."  
And that was the last thing Eren Jaegar said.

(...)

Jean couldn't hear a word Marco was saying, he remained frozen as he watched Erwin pace the labs with furrowed brows. Armin had been questioned over and over, asked to repeat exactly what he had done before Annie had spoken but nothing had happened. Ymir leaned in the corner, watching as the others tried to make sense of the situation and Krista sat with Armin, the two huddled in a corner waiting for orders.   
"Mikasa must have known," Marco said silently, "which is why she increased security. This must be why the plan was put off."  
"Whatever the reason, Annie's...awake. I knew it would happen but now that it has I don't know what to do."  
"Who was meant to be on patrol next?"  
"Connie and Sasha, then Reiner and Berthold."  
"Well they can't know about this."  
Before he could speak, Erwin walked to the centre of the room with orders that no information may be shared and that but sunrise, all of the Survey Corps were to move to the Walls as the original plan dictated. Jean bit on his lip, this meant they thought Annie's crystal would melt at any time since one of the larger cells was found under Wall Maria. But how could this be happening, someone must have noticed her vitals change, no one could just wake up, could they? Whilst Erwin spoke, he moved silently to the computers, only Marco watching his movements, and logged on to the database. At first, he didn't know what he was looking for but he then he saw it, dates missing from logs of records, dates in which Annie must have changed in some way. It was stupid to ask Mikasa who was on patrol, because the dates were from before, but then he saw the cameras. Maybe whoever wiped the records was not smart enough to think about the cameras tucked away in the corner. He tried to plan it out in his head, sneak in and check the recordings before the departure. He had to do it before someone was based to guard Annie, otherwise the person who swiped her details may use the time to their advantage. It was the slight creak of metal that tore Jean's eyes from the screens, and he saw Marco leaning over his shoulder with his eyes scanning the letters. Marco's faux eye looked to be moving, the milky pupil moving slower than the other.   
"Dinner time, we'll check then," Jean whispered before standing and taking his old spot.   
He felt his body relax a little, now they had a plan, but he couldn't refrain from biting his lip, or noting the way Ymir watched him from her corner in the room. 

(...)

The titan screamed as it crashed into the ground. Blood mixed with tears, and Mikasa roared into the air as her blades sliced through flesh. She knew the creature was dead but she would not spot until it was reduced to ribbons of flesh and bone before it's body disappeared.  
"YOU KILLED HIM," she screamed as blood shot into the air and finally she dropped back onto the ground, tears burning her eyes. She did not think to take note of the fact that the titans body did not dissolve into the ground, she found it hard to even breathe. Eren was gone, taken from her in a matter of moments, and she didn't even know why. She'd kill them all, every single titan, until humanity was safe - she wouldn't let him die in vain.  
She stood finally and walked towards the crumbling Wall where more titans had poured through, and replaced her blades before preparing herself. She could see no one else, was she the last soldier left? Before she could charge, the darkness took over and she was sucked away.  
It felt like using 3DMG gear, but without the knowledge that you'd survive the plummet. Her body was weightless, her limbs heavy as her head tipped back and the air burned past her. Her fingers stretched out to touch the nothingness around her but she could do nothing to stop it.

When she woke, she was blind. But she was smaller, that much she was sure.  
"Stop her from wriggling," ordered a familiar voice.  
"Eren," she sounded young again, maybe ten, "where is Eren?"  
"Put something over her mouth."  
"No way," piped up a new voice, "she almost bit my thumb off last time!"   
Mikasa tried to wriggle, but she found her wrists had been clamped and were held by metal reinforcements. She didn't know what was happening but she knew she had to get out. Suddenly, the blindfold was ripped from her, and pale blue light filled her view. She was in a small room with three or four figures, one body lay on the ground with a bag over the head. The room was prominently wood, with metal equipment strewn in neat, methodical piles throughout. Windows looked out at the trees, the looking Wall Maria stood not too far away, ripped open for all to see. She watched at the heavy wiring danced in the wind like the branches of the trees in the forest, standing guards like giants prepared to fight the titans. The room was otherwise dark, the light too faint to make out obvious features of her kidnappers. For a moment, she thought of her mother and father, she thought of the way her mother's body dropped to the ground...  
"I want my brother," sobbed the little girl.   
"He is fine Mikasa, I would never hurt my son."  
Grisha Jaeger stepped into the faint light, and looked at Mikasa with both familiar and strange eyes. His long hair was tied in a loose pony tail and his usual suit was replaced for a long white shirt stained with blood. A necklace hang from his neck, and the pendant...no the  _key_ hung inches from her face.   
"Five injections, and nothing has turned you. You're too strong."  
Mikasa knew he wasn't really speaking to her but rather, he was speaking his thoughts aloud. She didn't want to question what the injections were, from the look in his eyes the answer would only bring more pain. She watched as Grisha gestured, and one of the figures picked up the body from the ground before throwing it onto the chair next to her. She almost breathed in relief when she realised the person was still alive.   
"Take of his cover."  
The man did as he was told, and the face of a handsome boy was revealed. His dark eyes were piercing, filled with rage and anger and torment, and his black hair curled at his nape, sticking through sweat. The boy spat blood onto the ground, "Erwin will be looking for me."  
"Commander Smith has more pressing concerns," Grisha snapped before turning to the stout, bald man who stood beside him. The man was unimpressive, aside from his large side there was nothing to distinguish him from the blur of people left in the world. "He's just like her, five injections and nothing."  
"They're both Ackermans, maybe that-"  
"He's not related through blood you idiot. He just took the name. It's something about them, the way they think..."  
"Your son responded much better, the three others are different however. Their titans forms vary."  
"How do?"  
"Your son resembles that of a normal titan in many respects, except he is found with muscles and other qualities labelling him as human. The others, well they look as though you've turned their skin inside out."  
"Different coding, we had to test the variables. Pump these two with more serum."  
"Sir-!"  
The two men began to argue as the others prepared two large syringes. Mikasa couldn't remember much, but she remembered each shot sent searing pain through her. What did they mean by what they said? What had they done to Eren?  
"Oi," whispered the boy. She turned to see his eyes focused on her, and noticed his hand turned in a way that looked at though he was reaching out to her, "it won't hurt if you squuze my hand, okay. I know how to handle pain."  
"So do  _I_ ," she snapped, but couldn't help shimmying her arm through the clamp to clasp on to his hand.   
"And trust me, in the future, you'll face more of it. But for now, you don't have to carry it alone. It'll break you."  
Mikasa didn't have time to speak before a needle piercing her skin and she screamed into the night.

(...)

Levi sat on the edge of the bed, pressing a fresh cool towel to Mikasa's forehead. He'd sat there for ten minutes, watching as she twisted and whimpered. At one point, she'd stretched her hand out and he'd felt compelled to take it. She looked so young, small and fragile but he knew that when he eyes opened she'd be as deadly as ever. He squeezed her hand once more before standing, just as Erwin walked in.  
"She's up," was all he said.  
Levi followed his Commander down the halls, listening to the plan to move out at sunrise and getting to the Walls before Annie could melt her crystal. Erwin spoke with the power of a real leader, speaking of the logistics of having Levi and Mikasa on guard, of having Eren kept away from all this as well as not letting the military police to know. Levi offered what help he could, such as suggesting Hange uses some energy of the Walls to power the prisons beneath. Erwin did not question Mikasa on the bed, but Levi could tell that he was careful to mention her in the plans as they made their way to the conference room - a large metal room with a wide iron table that ran it's length, and iron chairs stationed to allow 12 people to sit at it. There was only one window that faced the head of the table, and posters of the different factions of the guard placed in symmetrical displays. Levi noted that the Military Police however, had a much larger display. Erwin had piled files upon files onto the desk, and sat in his chair with a thud before gesturing Levi to join him. Since they'd discovered Annie's details being tampered with, Levi and Erwin had gone through all they thought they could: cameras, data handlers, who had what access, but all of it came up fruitless. Whoever did this was smart, but Levi knew that the smartest people were the sort who liked to play a game, who liked the be chased.   
"I don't think this is just one person. I think it's a group, and they're being ordered," he spoke suddenly.   
"But why?"  
"Annie's waking up, maybe she'd give us the information we need and someone doesn't want that to happen-"  
"-so they'd want to take her from us before she melts," Erwin finished. "It makes sense. Look Levi, I only trust you and Ackerman with this, understand? Even Mike...I don't know-"  
"Why us?"  
The question seemed to take Erwin by surprise, and he bit on his lip for some time, "Fine, it's not  _you_ but her. Her brother was almost killed by this titan, she wouldn't be on the team who'd take her away before questioning. She'd-" he paused when he realised who he was speaking to, "and you don't have any prior attachments to Annie. But remember Levi, I've trusted you in the past and it worked."  
It was half-assed if anything, but Levi accepted it. He gave Erwin a nod before leaving the room with the intention of finding Mikasa. It was strange, to know you should feel a sense of panic and concern and to only find a sense of excitement instead. 

(...)

"Nothing," moaned Jean as he leaned back, "they got the cameras."  
"I'm sure someone will have thought about this before us Jean, but there might be something."  
Jean stared at the mechanic features beside him, the click of the synthetic muscle, the whirl of the pacemaker. How human was Marco? If there was more metal interwoven into him, would he still feel as though he wanted to protect humanity when he had no attachment to it? "Check the deleted files," the other boy said, breaking Jean from thought.   
"What?"  
"Sometimes, people forget to completely delete things. The amount of times I've had to show Berthold to do it is ridiculous. So look-"  
Jean did as he was instructed, feeling warmth radiate on his shoulder as Marco placed a still human hand upon it and gave it a reassuring squeeze.   
It was then, they found the missing footage.

(...)

Mikasa ignored the pounding in her head and shook the dream from her senses. It all felt like some horrible memory, repressed and locked in a cave in the deepest realms of her thought. She didn't want to ponder any of it. The room she was in was different, sterile was the one word she could think of. For a moment, she felt guilty for ruining the crisp white sheets.   
"She's awake Captain!" came a familiar voice. Mikasa sat up quicker than she should have and saw Eren sitting beside her with a worried smile, Armin sat in the chair beside her and in the corner of the room stood Levi, one foot pressed against the wall.   
"Why am I-"  
"We think you had a panic attack of sorts, but if we're honest we have no idea Ackerman."  
"You just dropped from the ground and started shaking, you were yelling about titans-" Eren began but Mikasa could barely pay attention. The more she looked at Levi, the more familiar he grew. He was the boy, in her dreams. But they hadn't felt like dreams, they'd felt like-  
"Have you ever been to Wall Maria?"  
Her question stopped Eren dead in his tracks, and Armin turned to look at the Commander, who seemed bored by the turn of events. Levi inspected his nails before making eye contact with her, "Not to my knowledge, not recently."  
"What about after the titans?"  
"No, I was not at Wall Maria."  
She sighed, breathing lightly, and refrained from smiling. This meant it was all just a lucid dream, nothing of note. Shaking off the bed clothes, she stood and brushed imaginary dirt from her before completing the expected bow to Levi. Before anyone could question her, she stepped from the room and tore through the halls, feeling the cool air barrel past her.   
Someone was calling her name but she didn't care, she had to see the Walls. As she reached the far window, she saw the edge of it all, the metal structure looming like an eager giant.   
"How long till you fall?" she whispered. 

An hour later, Mikasa stood in the conference room with Berthold and Reiner, all three with stiff backs awaiting orders. They were arranged in order of ranking, the reason all three had been summoned by Erwin. "Keith has suggested you three join Levi in leading Annie's body to the Wall. You will leave now, the rest of the Corps will join you in the morning. I cannot stress the seriousness of the situation and how secretive you must be. Your supplies are prepared so you will have nothing to deter you from the mission."  
He nodded at each of them before turning on his heel and walking out the room. Beside her, Reiner breathed out and loosed a little while Berthold retained his stiff stance. She didn't bother looking at the two boys, but focused on the door as Levi walked through. He was in usual uniform, but there was something different. His shirt was looser and seemed to be made of a lighter material, his boots were not in their usual polished state. "Let's go," was all he said to them, but it was enough to have all three cadets move towards the door, weighed down with the knowledge that Annie could break free at any moment.   
It was a blur of material and cloth, and Mikasa silently muttered through her check-list as she packed her horse up. It grunted softly, and she quickly pat it's muzzle before feeding it three slices of apple. It deserved a treat before the mission.   
"You okay?"  
She was surprised to hear a tone of concern coming from Levi, and she blushed despite everything - she must have been a mess if Heichou was concerned. When she turned to look him in the eye, he was focused solely on her with dark eyes piercing through her. Looking at him gave a sense of vertigo, he was so much smaller but something about him seemed giant.  
"Fine," she lied, pushing back memories... _dreams_ of a hand stretching out for her. She thought she'd kissed him at some point. but almost laughed the idea away. He'd never kiss her, she couldn't see him caressing anyone unless it was to strangle them.   
He did not smile, just turn on his heel and motion for Reiner and Berthold to get on to their horses. "I'm sorry you could not say goodbye to your brother," was all he said before he walked away.

(...)

It took time piecing the recordings together, but Marco did not seem deterred. Whoever had deleted the files was not completely stupid, they'd encrypted it. It'd almost be impossible to decipher, unless you were Marco. Jean, despite the seriousness of the situation, smiled and kissed the other boy on his metal cheek. He felt the thrumof Marco under his lips, sending a tingle of energy through him.  _He's alive, alive, alive._  
"What was that for?" smiled the other boy as he reloaded a set of files.  
"I'm proud of you, that's all."  
"Jean, we're trying to see who this apparent titan spy is, and you're taking the time to be "proud"?"  
He took some time before responding, "Yes."  
Marco shrugged and turned back to the screen. They'd been working in the cramped room for hours, trapped beside electrical cables and screens that showed the whole compound. Around ten minutes before, he'd watch Levi and Mikasa ride out in new gear, guns joining the blades strapped to their belts, with Berthold and Reiner following in close pursuit, pulling what looked like a metal carriage, though Jean suspected it was a cage. No one questioned this, if Levi and Mikasa were involved they must have been given orders from the higher ups.   
"Are we almost done?"  
"What about being  _proud_?" smirked Marco before the computer beeped loudly.   
The screen whirled and the recording began to play. The two watched with bated breath as Marco fast forward, showing scientists checking the crystal, Erwin standing in front of the glass partition, and then-  
"Stop it there!" Jean ordered.   
Marco did as he was told, and the recording paused on Reiner sitting at the computer.   
"It was him."

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys liked it.  
> I'd love to know what you guys thought of it and it'd be great if you could comment or message me your feedback on tumblr (mfairchilds.tumblr.com/erwiiinsmith.tumblr.com) cause it's my first time doing something like this really. 
> 
> Thanks :)


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